People who know me are aware that I love a good joke, no matter how old and/or corny. If it raises a titter, it's for me. However, I have a dilemma. I thought of a joke today but in light of the circumstances in which I thought up the joke I am reluctant to tell it.
My good friends Kaleidophone whose music I have played on Into The Unknown (jeffhickmott.podomatic.com) and whom I witnessed live at Tentertainment recently (brilliant gig, by the way chaps!) have had all their gear stolen from their van. Normally they unload their van after each gig but this one night they did not. Next morning the stuff was gone, with no sign of forced entry. Not a funny situation. But without wanting to, a joke popped into my head (more on that later).
I'll let them tell the story.
Thanks so much for all your help so far! Here is a list and photos of all the equipment stolen from our van in Maidstone in the early hours of Tuesday morning (14th July). Please share as without this equipment we can't gig and fulfil any of our bookings. If you see or hear anything please get in touch!
Fender American Telecaster light brown
Fender American Jaguar 62 reissue
Vox AC30 white 54 Anniversary edition
Pedalboard Flight Case including various pedals; RAT, keeley compressor, T-Rex reverb, Tube screamer, Eventide Timefactor.
Fender Jazz Bass America (Natural/Cream)
Novation Ultranova Keyboard in Flight Case
Mackie DL1608 Digital Mixer in Flight Case
3 x Shure PSM200 IEM Systems
Apple iPad 2nd Generation
Pedal Board Flight Case including Big Fuzz Pedal, Boss Octave Pedal, TU2 Boss Tuner and Tap Tremolo LovePedal
Small Flight Case with various audio cables.
Farida CT-30 guitar (prototype 1-off) and case.
Vintage Fender Vibroverb Combo - Silverface (1970's) in an NSP flightcase.
Gibson epiphone acoustic (1970's)
Pedal Board Flight Case including Jet City Overdrive Pedal, Line 6 DL delay pedal and Boss Tuner.
Westone In ear monitors + wireless pack.
Akai MPX8 sample trigger pad.
Pearl Free Floating Snare Drum + Hardcase
Roland SPD-SX + Stand, Snare Drum Trigger (RT-10s) + Bass Drum Trigger (RT-10k) all in NSP Flight Case with distinctive red/pink internal foam.
Westone In-Ear Monitors
Iron Cobra Single Bass Drum Pedal in case.
Drum hardware including Hi-hat Stand, snare Stand, 3 x Pearl Cymbal Stands, 3 x Sonor Tom Arms, 2 x Pearl Clamps, Gretsch Tom Arm, Gibralter Seat Base, Drum Stick Bag all in hardware case.
Gretsch Catalina Club White Pearl 12”x9” Tom.
Most of our gear was in NSP Flight Cases and some had 'Kaleidophone' stencilled on the case.
Kaleidophone Thanks everyone, we've just heard that 4 other vans were
targeted within a mile or so of us. All with the same symptoms (no entry signs),
apparently you can get a master key for transit vans! Just found a number of
other area police force warnings that this has become an issue. Never heard of
this until now! We do always unload our equipment, the night we don't...
Here's a link to Kent Police's website with the story. http://www.kent.police.uk/appeals/witness_appeals/pages/150716_maidstone_tra.html
Sad story, the band cannot gig without their stuff and some of this stuff is personal and irreplaceable.
So to make light of the situation by coming up with a joke revolving around a band having stuff stolen is in terribly poor taste.
But damn my brain, that's what it did.
I tried to suppress it, I really really did. I wish I hadn't thought of this joke.
But I did, so I apologise to you, the reader, to Kaleidophone, and also to any band that has suffered at the hands of equipment thieves in the history of the world ever.
Here is the joke. Feel free to vilify me at will.
"Thieves broke in to music rehearsal rooms last night, stealing all the wiring and cables. Police say they have no leads."
Please help me make this situation better by keeping a vigilant eye for any of Kaleidophone's property. I promise I will not make up any more stupid jokes.