Rubbish, piffle, tommyrot, drivel and utter bilge

Monday, March 19, 2012

A Hairy Tale

I used to sport a goatee. I enjoyed having one, I kept it neat and tidy. I don't have one now, but you never know, I might someday go back to having one. It's the only kind of beard I would consider having, although i don't have anything against beards in general.

Except one.

A few years ago a certain English footballer married to a Spice Girl popularised the neatly trimmed two-day-growth, and completed the look with the super fit bod and the neatly trimmed hair. At around the same time an alarming trend had started among young professional men - the neat hair with the one spiky askew bit sticking out of the front or the top like an incongruous hair horn. That I could still live with.


Two or three years ago it all changed. The neat two-day's-growth became the scruffy two-day's-growth, and the one spiky bit in an otherwise neat head of hair became lots of spiky scruffy bits pointing out of the head at all angles, creating the general impression that the hipster that owned the head of hair had somehow been involved in an altercation with a gorse bush.

Now I know I talked about facial hair before in a post entitled Indie Name Of Beards, but I am not talking about your Zach Galifiananinanlkllkikkbiibiillis beard,which is the I-don't-give-a-rat's-ass beard. I'm talking about these beards:

This may look like Jake Gyllenhaal on a bad day but it is in fact Shia LaBeouf. True story.

Scruffy buggers one and all.

Guys, if you want to do facial hair right, go to the king.

And if you want the scruffy look complete with hair, go to the master.

 Need I say more?


  1. So ... Rupe's doing it wrong, eh?


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