This Must Be Stopped

If there is one thing I enjoy, it's when my friends on Facebook tag me in a picture and it turns out to be one from years ago that I had forgotten all about. It's lovely, that sudden rush of nostalgic bliss. "I remember that! That was a fun day/night/holiday/party/whatever!" It's such a good feeling that when your notifications list contains the message "So-and-so has tagged you in a photo", you start to feel good in anticipation.

Recently, however, this feeling has been replaced by fear. Fear that it won't be a great photo you've been tagged in, but one of these suckers...

Now, I don't mind these things, they're harmless enough. That is, until you are tagged in one. Because then every time someone makes a comment regarding this picture, you are notified. Even though you don't know half of the people in the stupid thing, you have to be informed that Joe Whatsisname has commented on a photo you were tagged in. And you don't know which photo that Joe has made a comment about until you go check for yourself. That's when you find that (a) it was this stupid picture, and (b) Joe (whom you don't know) has made some inane comment like "Wtf lol" about someone else you don't know. The only people you know in the pic are yourself and the twit that tagged you. And all you can think is, "That's 30 seconds of my life I will never get back."

All those 30-second picture-checking wastes of time add up, until over your entire lifespan, you find you've lost an entire day getting excited for no reason from checking to see which photo you were tagged in or commented about. This is why this kind of thing must be abolished forthwith. Trust me, there will be lots of teenagers who will be pissed off, but they'll thank us in 30 years time when they are a day better off for not having to have endured this time-wasting misery. That's right. They will have a parade and a big party to thank us for giving them the gift of time. "Thank you, old people," they will say. "You saved us from thousands of potentially stress-related ailments, all because you abolished those dopey TagMyPals pictures on Facebook." To which their kids will retort, "WTF is Facebook yo?" or some such 'yoof of today' type remark.